Ways to Improve & Update

I have been thinking of ways that I can improve my life style so I can be a happier me and in turn be a better mommy. That's all I want to be is a good mom.

1. Meditation
I have started a new nightly ritual. After Rylan goes to sleep, I end up doing homework for a few hours. Facebook always distracts me so a 1 hour homework session always turns into 2 or 3 hours. Anyways, after I get done with homework, I sit on my floor and meditate in the dark, sometimes with soft music in the background. Having that silent time to myself has really brought me some sanity. I think I have my own form of meditation. I don't know if I "do it right", but having that quiet, positive thinking time really helps me think happy thoughts before I go to bed and in turn I wake up happier.

2. Vitamins/ Eating Healthier
I have not been taking my daily vitamins. I think that if I get into the habit of taking my vitamins and not having ANY fast food, I will feel better. The hardest part will be cutting out cokes from my life. I have gotten into the nasty habit of drinking 1-3 44oz cokes a day. I have gotten addicted. Like, for me to function fully, I need to run down to the gas station and grab a coke-a-cola. One, that is a tone of money down the drain. Two, no one ever said coke was healthy for you. Even though I wish it was... daily.

3. Yoga
Well, I already have the yoga pants, why not put them to good use? I have realized that it has been six months since I had Rylan. I can't pull the "its still baby fat" trick anymore. Granted, I know that I will not be 100 lbs again unless I start downing diet pills and become anorexic again. (Secret: I have to tell myself daily to not throw up my food and that being 100 lbs was unhealthy. Secret #2: I only think I am skinny enough/pretty when my ribs look like they are sticking out. Basically when I look like I just stepped out of a concentration camp. Don't judge or ask me why. It is just something I deal with on a daily basis.) Anyways, I want to be healthy. Not anorexically skinny. I want to be able to look at myself and think that I am a good, HEALTHY weight. So, I think Yoga would be a nice, quiet workout for me to do when Rylan takes naps during the day. Also, I heard its really relaxing.

4. NO MORE SMOKING
John and I have come up with a plan to stop smoking! I have tried these past few months, but with John not on board, it has just been a failed mission. Its hard to quit when there are cigarettes constantly around. But! Hopefully, in a few months, we will be a smoke free household. Now, for those of you who do not know, we do not smoke around Rylan. When we are driving and he is in the car, we don't smoke. We do not smoke inside our house, we always step outside. I am determined to quit smoking! I hope that this works because I miss being able to breathe.





Update on Rylan Boy:
Oh, how it has been a long week. My little duckie is still sickly. Even though he has not been feeling well, he has a continuous smile on his face. You can't even tell he is sick until he starts hacking up a lung or snot drips straight from his nose to his mouth. Which is gross every time. Ry has never been super sick before so this is a new experience for me. I find myself waking up at night just to check on him. Night time is a horror. Every time he coughs it sounds like he is choking so I rush up to make sure he is alright. Sometimes he coughs so hard he starts to vomit and chokes. It scares me because I don't know when it will happen. Sleep has not come easily these past few days to say the least. Tomorrow I will be calling his doctor to see if there is anything else they can do for him. The antibiotics he was put on do not seem to be helping much. Hopefully he will heal quickly and he will able to get back to his normal, happy self.
Even though he is sick, I am so thankful for my baby boy. He brings so much joy to our home. Watching him go through these sickies like a champ makes me so proud. I love my baby boy.

"If there's anything to say, If there's anything to do, If there's any other way, I'll do anything for you."