Ramblings of a mother

No pain, no gain, right? I can tell I am overdoing myself when the pain medication the doctors gave me at the hospital isn't quite working anymore. On the plus side, I feel like I might be starting to get used to this whole no sleep thing. Rylan  doesn't really have a set schedule on when he sleeps or for how long he sleeps so its kind of a guessing game on when I will get sleep and for how long. I think the nights are the hardest where I lay down and five minutes later little man wants to be held or burbed or fed again or have his diaper changed or has gas, etc  etc. It's all a part of being a mommy though, so I am okay with it.

I must admit, I have felt a bit overwhelmed at times. Today, I made a big step (in my eyes anyways). We have been having visitors and I have been forcing myself to let other people hold him. I am still a bit nervous about it all, but I am trying to let my guard down. I also let his Grandma Douglas hold him while I cleaned up his room a bit. I could tell that really meant a lot to her. 

Ry had his first bath today. it wasn't a "real" bath per say, because for now, he can only have a sponge bath until some bandages come off. But, he was so cute. He didn't even cry. What a good boy.

I can not get over the feeling I have when I hold my son. Sometimes, it is just overwhelming. I feel happy and anxious and overjoyed and excited. Every time I hold him, i say a little prayer for him. I hope that one day when he grows up he will be able to see how much I love him.